Whenever a stitch in time saves nine, LeVar Burton saves ten and a half.

A penny saved is a penny that Levar Burton will use to buy a book for a poor kid.

Levar Burton doesn’t fight fire with fire. He obviates incandescent conflagration with radiantly rapid oxidation.

LeVar Burton's first spoken word was antidisestablishmentarianism.

A warning to women everywhere, do not make eye contact with LeVar Burton while ovulating, his seed is too strong and will turn to pure energy in utero.

Levar Burton is Chuck Norris' Chuck Norris.

Between general relativity and quantum mechanics lies Burtonian Physics.

LeVar Burton's multi-faceted talents are the reason nuclear fusion is in electron flux at the core of the sun, his Reading Rainbow of Love is responsible for the magentohydrodynamic waves heating the solar corona, and the photosphere is the gentle way he presents his energy to us on Earth. Thus solving the solar neutrino problem.

LeVar Burton had to wear a special energy-damping-visor in Star Trek because the emotion he can convey without it would rip apart the very soul of other cast members.

Levar Burton is related to everyone in the House of Representatives. Everyone in the Senate wants to be in the House.

Levar Burton has moved on to the Rubix dodecahedron.

Asking Levar if "everything sounds o.k." was the last step in making all Beatles Albums. (+ Levar was the walrus)

When Yoda said "...there is another." He meant Levar Burton.

Levar Burton's copy of Window's Vista works perfectly.

The Blue Man group is mostly Levar Burton.

All of Monty Python (not just Graham Chapman) wanted to date Levar Burton.

James Lipton is only teaching Inside the Actor's Studio while LeVar Burton takes an extended sabbatical.

LeVar Burton told Leibniz and Newton about calculus at the same time, just for fun.

The last time LeVar Burton winked at a woman she orgasmed herself into a coma.

The dark matter physicists are looking for is merely the essence of LeVar Burton.